Heeling Society - Published Vancouver Photographer & Model

I had the privileged of meeting Chad last year and since then we have worked and collaborated together on a few different photo shoots. I also have the honour of calling him my friend. Every one of our sessions together holds a special place in my heart and this particular shoot definitely ranks in the top.We were honoured with securing cover on Issue 6 of Beauty Mark Magazine with this set and I couldn't be more proud. When I first read Chad's article, that was to accompany the images we took in Vancouver, BC of him showcasing his fabulous heels, it brought me to tears. Don't take my word for it though,read for yourself ...  My name is Chad Walters. And to self-locate, I am a 30 year-old, gender-fluid, gay-identified,European-Aboriginal Canadian man. I did my undergrad in social work at the University ofBritish Columbia and am currently making my way through graduate studies in the same field.I’m just some guy who wants to relax the rigid - and often oppressive - gender norms that runrampant in our world. I felt inspired to write, and so here I am.  I remember a sociology prof at university encouraging us to push back against and defy normsand social mores, if only to experience the awkward tension. He highlighted the discomfort thatis often felt when citizens do not follow the social “rules.” He used an example of someoneentering an elevator but not immediately facing the door, as would be expected, and insteadfacing the back wall and the other riders. It confuses people by opposing what is known to benormal. His teachings have stayed with me and I have since paid close attention to oursociety’s norms and expected ways of behaving. Holding this attention throughout my socialwork degree has provided me with a hyper-awareness of norms that are oppressive, and it isthese norms, particularly, that should be pushed back against… with vigour. Our society defines what is normal and abnormal when it comes to how we look and what wewear, and within this definition are strict gender boundaries, and god forbid we step beyond theborder. For example, only men should wear ties, only women should wear makeup, only menshould have short hair, only girls wear pink, only women should paint their nails, and, my leastfavourite, only women should wear heels. Unfortunately, there are plenty more of theseunnecessary “shoulds” within our worlds. I am not a fan of this word “should;” it suffocates me.Perhaps “should” shouldn’t exist.Fortunately - acknowledging our privilege - in today’s Canada we are beginning to honour andrespect that gender and sexual identity are not the strict binaries we once presumed, and,instead, that self-expression and self-presentation are more lax and fluid. More and morepeople are presenting themselves to the world in more liberal, exciting and creative counter-culture ways, myself included.  My journey to authenticity has been long, and every day I continue to sink more deeply intomyself. Owning and announcing my attraction to other men was a huge step towards becomingauthentic. Anyone who has struggled with and tackled their gender ad sexual identity has aclear understanding of how oppressive our society and the people within it can be. It is tough toexplore what feels right and authentic when doing so causes social discomfort and provokesnegative responses. However, social discomfort is often an impetus for change… and changeis good. It is time, again, for me to explore what feels right. I am writing today to share my experience of giving life to my desire to slap on some stilettosand head out into the public. I have occasionally seen images of men wearing heels and Ialways thought that it looked incredible. As someone who views the body as a canvass, onwhich I can be artistic and expressive, the thought of diversifying my wardrobe and appearancewith heels has always been alluring. I often thought, “women are so lucky… look at all of theseamazing shoes they can choose from. I want to be able to wear heels.” Let’s face it, theselection of shoes ascribed for men is more limited… bland, even. And who the hell says I can’twear heels? Society, with its death grip on what is and isn’t masculine.This past year I was drawn to a fundraiser for Foundation of Hope, a charity whose mandate isto assist LGBT refugees in their transition into Canada. The premise of the fundraiser was“walking a mile in heels is easier than a lifetime in the closet” - a way to bring attention to thetorment of growing up LGBT in an LGBT-persecuting country. This fundraiser spoke to twointerests of mine… LGBT refugees and stilettos! The shoe fit, so to speak. It was time to buysome heels… I suppose I needed that push, that justification.  I felt like a kid in a candy shop, as is often said, during my first trip to the shoe store. I instantlysaw the winning pair, neon with a 7-inch heel; I made the purchase. Naturally, I wanted to wearthe heels out of the store and so I walked out onto the street, feeling tall (for once) andconfident. I was surprisingly stable in those babies and walked with ease, mostly.Something unique happens to me when I put on a pair of heels. Firstly, I begin to feel sexier. Itis my belief that heels are intrinsically linked to women and her sexuality. It is not news thatmany men find heels sexy, and that men’s behaviour can be influenced by a woman in heels.Perhaps this is why most men cannot bear the thought of another man in heels… if heels arelinked to sexual attraction then a man seeing another man in a hot pair of heels will reallyconfuse him and challenge his whole idea of masculinity… “Wait, that kinda looks good. Am Igay?!” …probably not, no. Of course, there are boundless opportunities to dig into the blaringsymbolism of women walking through the world supported by teeny tiny phalluses - but that isfor an entirely different article. Collectively, we connect the word “sexy” to a woman in heels - itis written into our collective coding. It is for this reason, I believe, that I begin to feel sexier.That, and because I feel confident, and confidence is super sexy in and of itself. My confidence and self-esteem go through the roof when I am wearing heels; I feel like I cantake on the world. If you look at any strong, sexy and confident women in film, she is probablywearing heels… even while running away from dinosaurs as was the case in this year’s JurassicWorld. Part of this confidence may be connected to the height status factor - women who aretaller or the same height as men are often perceived as more assertive and powerful. Height =Power. Simultaneously, beyond my increase in height power, I feel the confidence that arisesfrom the basic awareness that I am pushing back against a nonsensical norm. I feel purposeand that purpose provides me with confidence to strut my stuff like no other - #werk. Stick it tothe man. Also, I feel happy when I am in heels. Why happiness? Because I am exploring new ways tobend gender, new fashions to spice up my appearance and new interactions with the socialworld around me. It is fun! Getting dressed up is always entertaining, whether for some specialoccasion or themed event… it is a blast to evoke new characteristics, and sexy stiletto sass justso happens to be the latest characteristic to wake within me. Furthermore, I am an activist atheart and stimulating social change is part of what brings me joy. Being counter-norm in ourmisogynistic and heteronormative society appeals to me and speaks to my passion, and anypassionate engagement is always fun. As I walk and dance around in 7-inch heels I amactivating something… conversations, a paradigm shift, new norms, etc. Beyond what it feels like, personally, I think it is appropriate to share some reactions with you,dear reader. One of the most surprising things about my heel experiences, both while shoppingand strolling, is how frequently I was called, “Girl.” Some of the comments were as follows (I’mrelying on your mental intonation and emphasis to make these comments come to life): “Work itGiiiiiirl!” - “You’re looking fab, girlfriend!” - “Guuuurl, you look so good!” This started to botherme. Why? Well, because I am not a girl. I am a man, I just happen to be wearing differentshoes. It fascinates me how a simple article of clothing became reason to re-ascribe my sex.Of course, “Girl” is just a word… but words make worlds. This, to me, was a blatantrepresentation of how gendered our world is, and, in turn, how restrictive and oppressive thatcan be. A woman is no less a woman for not wearing heels. A man is no less a man forwearing heels. In simplicity, the person is merely taller or shorter. On the sidewalk, and in the heart of the city, I walked past what I presumed to be a mother andher two daughters. As we passed each other I saw the mother smile and say, “girls, check outhis heels!” Little “wows” followed suit. It was positive and upbeat; there was acceptance. Itwasn’t a scoff or a shake of the head. Maybe those girls have never seen a man in heelsbefore, and maybe, just maybe, they now feel a tinge more confident to be bold themselves. Iwant to live in a world where difference is celebrated, and I believe that as we normalize genderfluidity the following generation is going to be so much more welcoming of the people who donot fit into tiny gender boxes. Trying on heels in stores is very interesting. In one store, a clerk ask if I wanted to try a pair inmy size - 10, p.s. It was truly a powerful moment for me. It was powerful because it was socasual and normal. It made it clear to me how much progress we have made as a society andhow fortunate I am to be living here. I could not leave the store without voicing my gratitude forher acceptance. Sometimes I can feel the looks and the stares, the chuckles and the respect. Ican see the daggers of the impatient husbands, perhaps daggers of jealousy over how stellarmy calves look in a great pair of stilettos - #ownit. Whatever the reaction, i view it as a goodreaction. It means something is happening, and I believe that it is a positive “something.”As I bring this to a close, and dream about a pair of heels I want to order from Australia, I feel itis important to leave you with a question: what have you always wanted to wear, and, what isstopping you? Go out there and throw your rock in the pond… it’s time to make ripples. Pushback.Chad WaltersVancouver, BC Get your own copy of Beauty Mark Magazine Issue 6

Posing with a Disability: Introducing the Queer, Curved and Crippled Male Model - Vancouver Boudoir Photographer

I was introduced to Andrew Gurza through a friend on facebook. He was going to be visiting Vancouver and was  looking for a photographer; it didn't take much to convince me that I needed to meet Andrew in person and capture his story. This man is going to move mountains, if you don't know him yet,  you will soon. His voice is strong and true when it comes to his advocacy of the queer disabled community. He will not be silenced. I am proud and honoured to now call this man my friend. Please go check out the work he is doing over at Deliciously Disabled  xoxox Jessica Rae

Posing with a Disability: Introducing the Queer, Curved and Crippled Male Model

Pictures have always been really important to me. I have always loved what it is that they represent. When you take a picture, you capture a moment in time. Not only do you capture the image, but if you look closely enough at the subject, you might actually be able to see what they were feeling as well. For myself, as a man with physical disabilities, the idea of taking a picture holds real power. When I take a picture, I want to show the world that I am in a wheelchair, that I am proud of it, and that I own that part of my reality. Each and every time the camera shutter clicks I want the viewer to know that my disability is right by my side, and won’t be ignored.In my work as a Disability Awareness Consultant, making disability accessible to the queer community via Deliciously Disabled, I have happily volunteered to take many a picture of myself. I did this, always, to ensure that Queers with Disabilities were somehow represented in queer media outlets. I loved these opportunities for a few reasons: 1) I love attention (no shame in that, right?) and 2) I finally got to see myself. For so many years I have begged, fought and clawed for representation and just to be noticed by my community, often feeling invisible in it. These pictures would help me change that, and show others in my position that they had a place too.I had gotten used to these photo shoots being done with just myself and the photographer – the two of us spending time working together to make me and my disability shine for the cameras. I was comfortable taking up this space on my own – there is an unmistakable power when you are the only sexy, seated and disabled guy in the room – and I jumped on it. Recently, I was given the opportunity to work alongside another model. I remember when I was asked, after the excitement of being professionally photographed had subsided (fame-whore, remember?), I was scared. I was immediately concerned about my body, and whether or not this model would be comfortable working with my unique body and me. My body that curved and contorted, that was seated and spastic and scarred. I started to worry how I would look next to him. I envisioned that he would look all sexy and suave, and I, try as hard as I might, would not. The camera would capture his beautiful body, and all the camera would see of me, was my cripple. I started to wonder if I could even go through with it. The day came. The first couple of shots were of me alone -- fun, relaxed, and easy. I smiled and laughed, the photographer putting me at ease. When those were done, it was time for me to be with the other model. I was excited because he was so sweet, but I also felt that pang of self-doubt. We both took off our clothes, and got in the position for the shot. At first, I didn’t dare move. I wanted him to call the shots, and I remember feeling that whatever I did, I had to make sure that my disability didn’t distract him. Here I was lying next to this model, I couldn’t be all disabled about it? Slowly though, we got comfortable with each other, and I was so happy he was with me. In those moments, I got to introduce him to my disability, and show him what being deliciously disabled is actually all about. He got to hold my spastic hands, nuzzle himself in the contours of my cripple canvas, and realize that I broke all the molds.As the camera shuttered on and off around us, I felt a sense of bliss come over me. I couldn’t stop smiling because I knew that when these images were developed, they would capture something important. They would show the world two very different men, one able, one not, lying together in happiness. They would show the world that the male form, no matter how it is configured, is a beautiful creation. Lastly, if you were to look really close at these pictures, you might see what I was feeling – I was both happy to show myself, my truth, to someone, and even happier that he actually saw me for the queer, curved, crippled man I am. - Andrew GurzaPublished in Vol 7 of Philosophie Boudoir MagazineThank you to Chad Walters aka LifeAsChad for joining me on this session and taking it to a whole new level xoxox**This post contains nudity  

Nothing is Concrete - Beauty Mark Magazine

Unplanned shoots are often the best...I was wanting to try out a friends studio space in Vancouver's west end so I invited Renee to come out and pose me. I also was interested in working with a man in a boudoir like setting, as I hadn't before, so I invited Chad Walters to join us. It was never my intention to have the two pose and model together but I am so thrilled that we did as the results and the story line that came through this collaboration really hit a mark.Chad took it upon himself to write an amazing piece about sexuality, that got picked up and published in Beauty Mark Magazine, which is included below.You can purchase a digital or hardcopy of this issue here: http://www.magcloud.com/browse/issue/1015324----------------------NOTHING IS CONCRETE...It is my experience that many folks come to the conclusion that others are either “gay” or “straight” - while the “bisexual” folks either get honoured as a third category or tagged as “confused.” What is this drive we have to guess and assume other peoples’ sexual orientation? Is it that easily categorized? The human experience of interpersonal attraction, orientation or sexual preference, however you wish to articulate it, is far too complex to merely answer “yes.” It is in our nature as humans to label, divide, separate and categorize - it adds a helpful structure to our world. Putting everything into a cute little box that can be neatly stacked has its advantages, surely; however, this obsessive inclination to pack complex human sexual preferences into two (maybe three) tiny boxes is incredibly imprisoning. I think that it is easy to confuse identity and attraction. Just because I identify as gay does not mean that I cannot be attracted to women - it just means that I identify as gay. Let’s just leave identity on the sidelines for right now and focus on the experience of attraction, that natural pull towards another human being. My body is wired to send signals and it accomplishes this through inputs of touch, scent, sight, and so on. Regardless of how I psychologically identify with any one group, my body will always do its job. One of the many invasive and personal questions I often get asked by others is, “Have you or would you ever have sex with a woman?” After making a point to inquire whether that person asks everyone such personal and inappropriate questions I say, “Well, I do not feel 100% gay.” This often confuses people. See, I view sexual attraction as a scale - a sliding scale. As a baseline, I often self-locate at 95% on the gay scale, knowing that, if the stars aligned just right, it is always possible to have a “run-in” with the big V. Yes, 95% is quite high and the reason why I am not at 100% is that I have met a few women who have shifted my marker.My marker definitely shifted during a recent photoshoot with a female model. Unintentionally, in front of the lens, a story unfolded between her and me. I have never modeled with a woman before but naturally, and as if magically, it soon became an intimate story of lust and longing where she and I were wrapped up in mutual attraction. Divided by a pane of glass we were left wanting for each other and, as the storyline progressed, we found ourselves posing with one another on a bed on set. We got close and cozy and allowed ourselves to enliven the role of a man and a woman in the fuels of passion. It was beautiful. To be entirely frank, this woman is stunning. While she straddled me, in her light blue lingerie, I became increasingly aware that I was only wearing briefs… “what if…?” I thought to myself, “this is incredibly sexy” – as I chuckled that my older brother would surely find it amusing that his “gay brother” was in this situation. Because I am human, with senses, I could feel her hair and skin, hear her, see her, and pick up her pheromones… my neurones and synapses were firing beyond my control. It was a professional and mature photoshoot, but because it was at the same time intimate and sensual I left contemplating my place on the sexual attraction scale.Nothing is concrete.

And of course, their solo sets with me from that same day...

Scáthach - Published in Conceptual Magazine

I have been sitting patiently on this set for almost a year! It was suppose to be published, but that magazine just ceased to exist one day! So I waited till I found a magazine that it would fit into and finally I came across Conceptual Magazine and they just happened to be doing an issue with the most perfectly suited theme. High Fashion Tribal. Boom! (and they accepted women's topless images - so grateful!)This was the very first time I got to work with Charlene from Faye Tality Couture. She lent us the amazing body cage and accessories, as well as the 2nd outfit. It was the start to a beautiful friendship. I love that she just lives down the street from me, works great for last minute, impromptu photo shoots!|Photographer: ArtistJessicaRaeDesigner: Faye Tality CoutureHair/Makeup: Marecel DanielMuse: Karilee * This post contains topless nudity * Purachase your copy of Conceptual Magazine Issue 5  HERE xoxox Artist Jessica Rae

Big thank you to Dana O'dell who wrote a short piece that was included in the publication

Scáthach

The birds stir up at her exhaled breath

It is her, the lone Warrior Queen

Her body is alive with the feel of earth and moss and bark

She breathes the air exhaled by those

Who walked before her

Now she remembers

why she is the Warrior Queen.

She lifts her face to the sun.

gathering light, brightening the darkest corners of the forest

as, she cries out.

A cry from generations past–that summons ravens and dragons

A cry that all those who love the darkness

should learn to remember.Dana O'Dell © 2016

2016 Photographer to Watch by Association of International Boudoir Photographers

Where do I even begin to find the words to express my gratitude and sheer shock! As I am in an editing frenzy, this morning, I see a notification come up on my cell phone with news I was not anticipating in the least. I have been awarded "Photographer to Watch in 2016" by the Association of International Boudoir Photographers."Truly a standout photographer, Jessica Rae has wowed us with beautiful boudoir artistry and business persistence. Her successful pursuit of commercial and editorial placements demonstrates her prowess and ambition. Not only is her work stunning, but she's a badass chick with a warm congenial heart that she lends to other members.Congratulations Jessica Rae and keep on rocking in 2016. " No words, I tell you, no words to describe what a feat that is for me. I was determined to find my place within my industry and among my peers in 2015 and I feel like I knocked that goal right outta the park with this. Humbled, honoured, and accepting this as a challenge to up my game even more!Thank you to all my clients, fans, peers, family and friends for all your support. I would not be where I am without all of you <3SMOOOOOOCHxoxoxoxJessica Rae

Here is a small sampling of some of my recent work <3

Victorian Boudoir : Gilded Magazine : Vancouver Published Editorial Boudoir Photographer

At the beginning of December I was playing around with new studio setups and  fell in love with this one so much that I put together a team right away and the next day this session happened. Sometimes the best laid plans aren't plans at all but whims of fancy! I partner up with one my of my favourite designers Charlene Rowley of Faye Tality Couture, she had the most amazing pieces to pull off the look I was aiming for. Fellow Maple Ridge photographer, Tanzyn Ambrose graciously agreed to be my muse for this set and she got all glammed up by the talented Makeup in Session's, Sana Nurani. I am so blessed to call all of these amazing women friends, and that they go along with my mad ideas <3These images  have been featured in Gilded Magazines issue 7 vol 2 edition. 

You can purchase a digital or hard copy HERE

Kerosene Deluxe - Published - Chilliwack Boudoir Photographer

What a way to ring in the new year - Published in the New Years edition of Pinups & Kustoms Magazine with my muse Kerosene Deluxe was the perfect way to say farewell to 2015 and HELLO 2016!!! I met Kerosene earlier this year and have had the pleasure of photographing her on a number of occasions. Not only is she a beautiful gal on the outside but she is just as beautiful on the inside. She is genuine and has a heart of gold and I am proud to call her my friend.We ventured up to the city of Chilliwack  so we could borrow a friends beautiful vintage car for this session. The sun was getting low in the sky and was casting the most beautiful golden light over the valley. I couldn't have asked for more. It was perfection! Kerosene did all her own styling, hair and makeup - she is a multi-talented lady at best <3xoxox Jessica Rae

Purchase your copy of Pinups & Kustoms New Years edition HERE

Published - VICTORIA - Giuseppina Magazine ( Fraser Valley Editorial Photographer )

When you surround yourself with creative people, anything is possible. I conceived this shoot idea late on a Tuesday night, on Wednesday I contacted a local clothing designer, Faye Tality Couture and arranged for a hair stylist and models, on Thursday we did the photo shoot. Nothing like a last minute concept brought to life, but it all came together effortlessly! Now you pair that with the fact we got published in one of my favourite arts magazines..... perfection!You can purchase a digital or hardcopy of Giuseppina Magazine Issue #33 HEREWardrobe and Stylist: Faye Tality CoutureHair Styling: Marecel DanielMakeup: Dream Clean MakeupModels: Dane Halo & Saryn McKenney 

Published - Philosophie Boudoir Magazine - Fraser Valley BC Canada

**This post contains nudity**It is such an honour to have my work included in a publication such as Philosophie Boudoir Magazine. To have my work appear along side some of the top photographers, in the Boudoir genre of the photography industry makes this girls heart so full. This is the second time I have had my work featured in Philosophie and it is also the very first magazine I was been published in! Thank you to AIBP (association of international boudoir photographers) I wanted to change it up an take this session outdoors. Thankfully we had an amazing summer in southern BC this year and we took to a local lake. I have been swimming at this lake in Maple Ridge since I was a little girl, so it holds a special place in my heart. Our province suffered from many large wildfires during the season and beacuse of this, at the time we did this shoot the air was thick with a smokey haze and you could smell the ash and soot all around you.I want to give a huuuuuuge, heart felt thank you to my team for making this amazing set possible.My lovely model Bella Fox -   Hair and Makeup by Marecel Daniel - Wardrobe by Beauty By Impairment Designs You can purchase a digital or hard copy of the magazine HERE  

Actual spreads from Philosophie Boudoir Magazine

Published with Theresa Rock

Published in Surreal Beauty Magazine with the lovely Theresa RockYou can get your copy here:http://www.magcloud.com/browse/issue/968227?__r=338832&s=w

Elite - AIBP - Recognition

There is nothing more more satisfying than the recognition of your fellow peers. I applied to AIBP (Assoc. of International Boudoir Photographers) last year and I haven't looked back since. They are a group of professionals that stand out from the rest. Their support, encouragement and expertise are beyond anything I have experienced in other photography groups and forums. It's pushed me to be a better boudoir photographer. It's pushed me beyond my comfort zone.It is with great pride (and a lot of hard work)  to receive my Elite Member badge today from the Association of International Boudoir Photographers today (AIBP).A newly launched program that recognizes media published and Award-winning photographers from around the globe.

It's dedicated to helping boudoir photographers improve their craft and excel in their businesses.

<3 xoxoxoxoJessica Rae

Published - Perspective Fashion Magazine May 2015

I've gone and done it again, I got published! But that wouldn't be possible without a fabulous and talented team, so a big huge virtual hug and thanks to the following:Model: Sassy MayHair and Makeup: Marecel DanielClothing Designer: Nicole Rose DesignYou can check out the full issue of Perspective Fashion Magazine's May 2015 edition HEREThese are the official page spreads in the magazine 

More images from the "Old Hollywood / Modern Pinup" inspired set

This first image is my favorite. I ordered a large framed canvas of this image to hang in my studio <3

PUBLISHED - How Boudoir Photography Helps Heal Me - Lemonade and Lenses June Boudoir Issue 2015

Perhaps it was a late night editing while indulging in a glass of wine (or two!) that spurred me to submit to Lemonade and Lenses June 2015 Boudoir Issue. That has to be it, as I am no a writer hahha  Alas, they loved my pitch and asked me to write an article about How boudoir photography helps heal me. It's be a long journey and while I have made huge strides I am still very much at the beginning of my career.The support of my clients, fans, friends and family has been so incredible and I just want to take a moment to THANK YOU! From the deepest parts of my heart, thank you <3You can purchase your own copy of the June 2015 issue here: http://www.lemonadeandlenses.com/issues/june-2015/I would like to share with you the article that I wrote......(PS. thank you to Chris O'Driscoll for help with editing)It was in grade 10 that I received my first camera, an old Hanimex which my step father passed down to me. At the time, I was heavily into the visual arts at school and the dept head allowed me to enroll in the grade 11/12 photography class. I was elated. We shot with film and this was before the digital age. I learned all the basics of photography and even got to develop my own negatives and make black and white prints in the dark room. I loved that it ignited both right and left sides of my brain. I was able to express myself artistically but it was still technical and there were “rules”.For as long as I can remember I have never been a girly girl. I tried to hide my figure under baggy garments, convincing myself I wasn't pretty enough. I didn't want the world to see me and I couldn't see a reason why they would want to. In 2005, I found myself in an unhealthy relationship where I quickly became pregnant. All that negative self talk I spent years going over in my own head suddenly was being reinforced by another.I didn't pursue my photographic career seriously until about 5 years ago (2010). By now I had 3 very young children and felt trapped by the relationship I was in. I was broken. I felt that I had lost myself. Getting back into photography was therapy for me, it was a release from my everyday life for me. It gave me a sense of power and control whereas I didn't feel I had that in any other part of my life at that time. I photographed whatever I could; family photos, weddings, event photography, you name it, I photographed it. Unfortunately my partner at the time was not supportive of my photography and it was a strenuous challenge to keep at it. Due to the continued negativity, I was losing my passion and felt myself starting to sink even lower. Then in 2011, I finally found the courage and with the support of family and friends, I left my ex.Not long after this occurred, I photographed my first ever boudoir session.Boudoir photography is a pretty intimate experience, and intimidating to many. It is about creating beautiful and intimate portraits of the client as well as making them feel confident and sexy, and intimate portraiture has gained incredible popularity in recent years.  As a woman,  we most possibly spend endless amounts of time and money pampering ourselves to look and feel beautiful. At the time, I'm not sure who was more nervous, me or the client. We did the photo session at her home and I remember her offering us both a glass of wine to help us relax. I helped her go through her outfit choices and pick out what I thought would flatter her best in her photos, all the while thinking, how fun is this?!Naturally, she was very shy and awkward at first. To help her relax, I just kept telling her how amazing she looked, and she that was rocking her poses. After showing her the images I had captured so far on the back of my camera I started to see her get more comfortable and really start to get into the session. Her body became more fluid and she couldn't stop smiling. After we were done she was just glowing and reeling. She told me she felt so amazing and uninhibited. I left that day on a high of my own. THIS, this was it. I needed more!I had found it. I found what ignited my passion. Watching this woman bloom before my lens was the most amazing experience for me and to know that she had just as amazing an experience as I did, well that was just icing on the cake. It was like a drug and I needed more!I'm a woman, just like you, and any other. I struggle at times to see my own beauty, to see my own worth. This body of mine has carried and given birth to three children. I struggle with an autoimmune disease. I have survived an abusive relationship, the emotional and psychological effects from which I still deal with. Due to that stress I first lost and then gained a considerable amount of weight. This body is foreign to me. This paired with the unrealistic standards set by the media we are confronted with on a daily basis, I did not have much in the way of self love or worth at a point in my life. Every time I work with women doing Boudoir sessions I feel a little piece of my soul start to mend.You cannot help but to be moved, swayed and empowered while you are lifting another up. I photograph women to show them how truly beautiful they are. I show them the beauty they often fail to see in themselves. I honestly believe there are no unbeautiful women in our society since beauty is a such a personal perception to each individual, it is just women that do not know they are beautiful. I'm not just a photographer. I'm my clients therapist and BFF for a few hours and by building up their self confidence, I also build my own piece by piece.

In July 2013, I met an amazing man and feel so blessed to now be in a happy solid relationship. Our relationship feels like such a perfect fit, he loves my boys as though they are his own, he is supportive and encouraging of my photography career and some days, I feel as though he has always somehow been a part of our life, that it doesn't feel like two years. In some of my artwork, custom furniture pieces he has created for me are featured, life as a boudoir photographer surely doesn't get any better than this.

Being a boudoir photographer has changed my life greatly. Despite the negative aspects of my past, I now find I exude more self confidence, I am not as critical of, and don't think of my body negatively. Sometimes in conversations, I catch myself on the times I am about to say something negative and find something positive to say instead. Boudoir photography has helped me face many aspects of my life, and overcome the personal obstacles I perceived there, it's helped heal me.

 Pages from the magazine...

Published - Vintage Boudoir Magazine

April has been an exciting month for me with many publications coming up that I have been featured in. It is such an honour, so exciting and really addicting!! I hope to have many more publications to share with you in the future. Thank you all for your support. Being able to make my passion my career, is the dream!Buy your copy of Vintage Boudoir Magazine Issue #10!Big thanks to Lakeisha-Rose for modeling and to Sana Nurani, of Makeup in Session, for hair and makeup.Here is the actual spread from the magazine. 

Published - PHILOSOPHIE Boudoir Magazine AIBP

I set out a goal this year to get published. Why?... why not?!  Seeing your work in print and being able to share it with others is an incredible thing. But when it's in a magazine put out by and filled with your peers - that's on a whole other level. I am so honoured to have my work be chosen as a feature, no less!The article that accompanies my images is a must read. ALTERED EGO -  How embracing alter egos with boudoir can alter our predominant ego, for the better.So a big thank to you AIBP ( Association of International Boudoir Photographers )and all the wonderful people who volunteer their time to put together this amazing magazine. You really outdid yourselves this time - you don't have to take my word for it though. Get your copy now!Here are few images from the set that you won't see in PHILOSOPHIE Magazine. Big thank you to the ever lovely Caelyx for modeling, always a pleasure working with you!**The images below do contain / imply  nudity**   

Daily Choice Award AIBP

It is always such an honour to receive recognition from my peers. Thank you AIBP!HMUA:  Master Stylist Kat